Dress Up Your Dog

by Chris Vegvary

Animals have no need to wear clothes, yet there are clothes out there made specifically for pets. What does this mean? Is it that we want to see them this way, or are they secretly communicating with us in order to let us know that they do, in fact, need clothing in order to get by? I lack the ability to communicate with dogs, so I could never honestly answer this question, but if you and your pet have some kind of mental link, or perhaps it talks to you similar to how Garfield and Jon communicate, then maybe you already know something I don’t.

If you feel like your pet wants to dress up in something, don’t be afraid to make that happen. Dogs may or may not feel embarrassment, but you won’t know until you put them in a ridiculously adorable costume, will you? Christmas already came and went, less than a week ago now, and you have a pet dog. Did you get them anything for the holiday season? Perhaps they’d like to be dressed up as an elf. It’s not strange if your dog enjoys the costume, either. If they didn’t, what would any of this be for? Nothing, that’s what. We can’t let that happen.

You don’t want your dog to go around just looking like a dog this year, do you? No, of course not. It’s not like there are only costumes for one time out of the whole year, right? Halloween is nice, but that time of year has come and gone, and your dog still wants to wear a delightful outfit. There’s all kinds of precious-looking pet costumes, including ones that can make your dog into a butterfly, a pirate, or even Michael Jackson (it’s truly terrifying, as you can see). I dare say that your dog would thank you for such a thing, if they could.

So are you convinced now that the best idea for your dog is to put it in a hilarious costume? I know I am. If you’re looking for the sort of costumes pictured, you can take a gander at those and a whole lot more by following some of the links throughout this article. Unfortunately, there are currently no selections for cats, but that might change…once cats become slightly more agreeable creatures.

Why Are There So Few Good Werewolf Movies?

by Chris Vegvary

How come werewolves aren’t as popular as vampires? Is it because they’re more likely to shred you with their bare claws and teeth (unless you’re dealing with one of those feral-type vampires)? I say that makes them more terrifying. And while I’m not arguing whether or not werewolves are scary as all hell (they are), I am arguing that there are so few good werewolf movies out there that it’s ridiculous.

When I think of a “good” werewolf movie, I’m not talking about something out of Twilight or Wolf, but more like something out of Dog Soldiers or the original Howling. By that, I mean biped werewolves that walk around on two legs, not a person who turns into a timber wolf or something like that. I enjoyed Eli Roth’s Netflix series Hemlock Grove, but the werewolf in that just turns into a wolf, although the transformation is pretty sick-looking. Ok, and the one from An American Werewolf in London, even though it was a four-legged wolf, was just horrific. I mean that in a good way, because that thing’s face was kind of disturbing to look at.

There’s something to me that feels more dangerous about a seven- or eight-foot-tall werewolf towering over you, drooling all over you and getting ready to rip you apart. Does anyone remember the movie Waxwork (1988)? While it was a comedy, it also featured a scene with a werewolf that haunted my dreams for a while after I saw it (I was a kid the first time). The werewolf grabs this guy by the head and splits his face open, and just rips him in two. It was truly disgusting, but that’s what werewolf movies out there are lacking these days. Also, I want to point out that there’s WAY too much CGI being used in Hollywood today, and werewolf movies are no exception.

Can we just make a good werewolf movie already? I’m kind of tired of seeing the same nonsense being put out these days, not doing right by my lycanthropic brothers and sisters. There have been attempts, like the Ginger Snaps trilogy, but I wasn’t too thrilled with those, and Wes Craven’s Cursed ended up being rated PG-13 after going through development hell. I enjoyed the remake of The Wolfman, but I do prefer werewolves to wolfmen, because there’s a big difference. Perhaps you, reading this article, could be inspired to go out there and make the werewolf movie we’ve all been waiting to see? It can’t be light-hearted, or a love story, or any of that old jazz. It’s got to be horribly violent; it has to rely more on old-fashioned effects than CGI; and it has to be a large, scary beast that wants nothing more than to eat you alive.

If your interest in werewolves and whatnot has reached new heights by reading this article, or if you’re just interested in horror in general, I encourage you to follow the links throughout to find some nice werewolf-related costumes and accessories for your next party, or if you’re looking to scare someone. What do you say to that?

Have A Costume Party

by Chris Vegvary

Why haven’t you had a costume party lately? Is it because you think costume parties are out? Can you not find the right costume? Let me just tell you that costume parties are still just as relevant today as they were in the 1980’s, like in all those movies you’ve probably seen.

How come you haven’t attended a costume party any time recently? If the reason is because you couldn’t find a good costume, then I can show you to some good stuff. Did you want to be a vampire? How about a witch? Be a box of cereal or anything you can think of. Couldn’t find a mask you wanted? Any excuse you can come up with to not attend or host a costume party, I can find two reasons why you should.

So what if it’s not Halloween just now? That is not necessarily a prerequisite of throwing a costume party, although admittedly, it does help. Don’t worry that it’s not that time of year. How about bringing a little nostalgia back into your life by throwing a costume party? I can’t stop pushing you into it until you agree to do it. I wouldn’t feel right about it.

Don’t judge me because I think costume parties are word; instead, join me in celebrating dressing up like other people or creatures and partying up the night. Bring your accessories and make it a real party. Not enough people throw or go to costume parties these days, and I’m aiming to change that by telling you that you should do it. Do yourself and your party guests a favor, though, and don’t host any parties in any abandoned or haunted buildings, mines, cemeteries, caverns, etc., or you’ll likely be looking at a horror movie-type situation, in which case I can no longer help you.

What’s Up With Ghosts?

by Chris Vegvary

Why are ghosts so terrifying? It could be the possibility that they actually exist, according to so many encounters and reality TV shows, yet I’ve never had the misfortune of having to see one. I’ve seen plenty of fictional ghosts, however, ranging from light-hearted Ghostbusters-style ghosts to twisted, pain-inducing ghosts in Insidious. While the ghosts in Insidious give me the chills, the ones in Ghostbusters do not, but that’s not to say I’d want to hang out with Slimer any time soon.

Luckily, if you own an animal, they apparently have the ability to sense things that come from another plane of existence. If you don’t own an animal, or if your animal is just too lazy to warn you when ghosts are near, there are ways to repel them. For instance, there are ghostly decoys you can use to draw them away, maybe make them think their colluding with fellow ghosts, when the decoys are actually for helping you keep it distracted while you either get away or try to capture the ghost (in a jar, like a lightning bug).

Or you could try these props to confuse the ghost. They point the undead towards the way they’re supposed to go, and assuming they go that way, you lead them right into a trap. If you don’t see yourself being able to trap a ghost, or if you find that there’s no escape for you do to supernatural trickery, you might try one last thing: pull out the ghostly shot glasses and see if it wants to join you for a drink.

Is the Scream Franchise Done?

by Chris Vegvary

Over the years, Wes Craven has given us some pretty powerful stuff. He made a film in 1977 called The Hills Have Eyes that showed us what a bunch of mutated, sick freaks out that live in the desert are capable of doing to a suburban family. In 1984, he gave the world Freddy Krueger, a child killer who is burned alive by a mob of angry parents, only to return in the dreams of their children to take his revenge. In 1996, the rules of horror movies were changed forever with Wes Craven’s film, Scream.

In Scream, the town of Woodsboro is under attack by a killer in a black costume who wears a ghost-faced mask, and who calls his victims on the phone, asking them "What's your favorite scary movie?" followed by a horror movie quiz and then death, or just taunting and death. Sidney Prescott, played by Neve Campbell, is the central character of all four films in the series. In the first film, she discovers that not only did she accuse the wrong man of murdering her mother previous to the events of the movie, but the one actually responsible for that murder as well as the outbreak of murders in the film is none other than her boyfriend and one of her good friends. They are, of course, dispatched in the end.

In the second film, Sidney goes off to college, having left her old life behind after most of her friends were killed in the Woodsboro murder spree. Unfortunately for her, Ghostface is not finished with her yet, and another killing spree is set into motion. This one also features two killers, revealed to be Sidney’s former serial-killing boyfriend’s mother and one of Sidney’s own classmates, and was the last of the good films in the series, in my opinion.

Scream 3 felt to me like it got way off track. Sidney secretly has a half-brother who’s jealous of her life or something to that effect? Come on. By this point in the series, it was almost too predictable, not to mention that it just wasn’t that good. We know certain characters just aren’t going to die, so we’re not super worried about their fates. What else is there? Do we care if all these new people introduced in this film die? Since none of them are particularly likeable, then no, not really.

Scream 4 was Wes Craven’s most recent attempt at recapturing the magic from the first film. Unfortunately, it fell flat. Feels to me like it tried to recreate the formula of horror movies first seen in Scream for a new generation of people who are glued to computers, tablets, iPhones, and so on. While there were some interesting ideas, it just seems like it’s not working anymore. Sorry, Sidney Prescott, but I think your adventuring days are over.

Will there be a Scream 5? Only time will tell on that one, but I wouldn’t be surprised if Scream 4 was the final nail in the franchise’s coffin. I've heard rumors of a remake, and I'm like "Whaaaaat? Way too soon." It was fun while it lasted, for the first two films anyway, but now it’s time to move on.

Christmas is Coming

by Chris Vegvary

So Christmas is coming around again, and Santa should be dropping down your chimney sometime in the next few weeks. What are you prepared to do about that? You could always disguise yourself as an elf, or one of Santa’s reindeer, or if you think you can seduce and then capture him, try wearing a sexy Mrs. Santa Clause outfit to distract him.

Your pet may need to outwit Santa as well, and you want to be able to give them every opportunity. In order to trick Santa, for whatever reason you may be doing it…ok, let’s be honest: you’re trying to get that sack he’s carrying away from him because he broke into your house and started putting boxes that don’t belong to you under your tree. Who does this guy think he is, right?

There may be another way to confuse Santa, however, but keep this on the downlow. If you want to freak Santa out, get yourself a Santa costume, get yourself a beard, and wait for him to come down the chimney. Once he hesitates, that’s your chance to react. String him up with Christmas lights and get that bag away from him, and there you have it: captured Santa. After that, he’s yours to do with what you will, but I would recommend letting him finish his rounds first…don’t want any children out there to not get their presents.

Protect yourself from jolly intruders bearing presents by dressing like them and throwing them off their guard before Christmas gets here. It’s just around the corner now…

Why is the Rocky Horror Picture Show Still so Popular?

by Chris Vegvary

For the life of me, I can’t understand what’s so appealing about The Rocky Horror Picture Show. People dress up like the characters from the film and go out and have these events where they watch the movie, talk along with it, sing, and dance. Is it really that powerful?

Whenever I think of that movie, the game Maniac Mansion comes to mind (those of you who have played the game may be able to see the correlation between the game’s plot and the film’s plot). In The Rocky Horror Picture Show, a couple of “squares” who show up to a castle when their ride breaks down, and from there, things just get weird.  We’re introduced to a cast of characters that I can definitely say is like no other, including the transvestite mad doctor, Frank N. Furter, who is played by Tim Curry. I can’t really describe the plot any further without confusing myself all to hell, so I’m going to assume you’ve seen it.

While I personally just “don’t get it,” there appear to be plenty of people out there that do, and they’re making the film culturally important. It’s preserved now in the US National Film Registry because it had such an impact on people. It’s been in theaters longer than any other movie in the history of movies. So while I still can’t say I like the film, I do like the plot behind it, and while I’ll never go to a theater dressed up as a character from this movie (or any other movie), I may decide to watch it again soon and maybe I’ll find a new appreciation for it.

But you, you clearly have a love for all things Rocky Horror, and that’s what this paragraph is all about. If you plan on dressing up for your next adventure to The Rocky Horror Picture Show, you’re going to need a good costume, right? Then follow the link and be overjoyed.

Are We on the Verge of Remaking Chucky?

by Chris Vegvary

Charles Lee Ray, AKA Chucky

In 1988, the world was introduced to Charles Lee Ray, a fictional serial killer (played by Brad Dourif) who uses voodoo magic to escape police by transferring his soul into the body of a Good Guy Doll. In the first three films in the Child’s Play series, Charles Lee Ray, or Chucky, as he is more commonly known, tried to escape the body of the doll he was trapped in by hunting down the first child he came into contact with after becoming a doll: Andy Barkley. Once Chucky’s plans were thwarted for a third time, he was dropped into a giant fan, and that seemed to be enough to get him to move on to someone else.

Chucky and his girlfriend, Tiffany

In his fourth excursion out into the world, Chucky looks quite a bit different, having been stitched back together after his last failed attempt at becoming human again. The fourth film in the series, Bride of Chucky, invites you to laugh along with Chucky and his girlfriend Tiffany (whom he has also trapped the soul of into a doll) as they go cross-country killing in a less serious attempt at horror. Again, it did not end well for Chucky, what with his girlfriend turning on him in the end.

Chucky, Tifanny, and their son Glen

By the time Seed of Chucky comes out, Hollywood seems to think something different needs to be done in order to keep the Child’s Play series fresh. So, much like the movie Wes Craven’s New Nightmare, but without all the seriousness and drama that was a part of that film, Seed of Chucky brings Chucky out of the realm of movies and into reality. Jennifer Tilly, who played Tiffany in Bride of Chucky, plays herself in the film and Redman is also featured. In this film, we saw that Chucky’s baby that was born from Tiffany at the end of Bride of Chucky is very much real and alive, and is searching for his parents. While Chucky is defeated one last time, room is left for a sequel as always.

Now we come to Curse of Chucky, the only film in the Child’s Play series so far to go direct-to-DVD. While I still have yet to see this one, I know that Chucky is no longer the stitched-up doll that he’s been since the fourth film. Instead, he resembles the doll from the first three films, undamaged, and Curse of Chucky takes place twenty-five years after the first film. So what does this mean for Chucky, that his most recent foray into the world of horror was not shown in theaters? Are we never to see another sequel to this franchise? My guess is no, we will probably not.

There’s been talk of remaking Child’s Play in the past few years. Brad Dourif is still attached to play and voice Chucky in the film, so that’s a plus. It seems the killer doll formula has been a little too overdone, but a remake could shake things up a bit, and at this point, when Chucky’s popularity seems to be at its lowest in terms of people going to see it in theaters, this could be just what they need to put him on top. Now, as for you, who can’t get enough Chucky in your life, I’d like you to take a look at the links posted throughout the article to find yourself some very interesting costume choices for your next costume party or Halloween, or what have you. Don’t be afraid, check them out today.